Have you ever wondered what the most important aspect of your relationship is to you, and maybe to your partner – are they different, or are they the same? Well in a survey of over 5,000 people who were asked to define the 10 most important aspects of their relationships, the most common answers came out and they’re not quite what you might have expected.
The most common answers were along the lines of ‘laughing together’, ‘sharing in values and interests’, ‘being best friends’, ‘being cared for and feeling supported’, ‘feeling safe and secure’ and others that too revolved around emotional aspects rather than physical. What people sometimes forget is that you need to maintain an emotional connection with your partner and the physical connection follows. Communication, sense of humor, and security are the most common important features of relationships – sex didn’t even make it to the top ten for most!
In fact, the least common answer from the survey was sex. If the most important factor to you is in the bedroom, you’re in the minority! We were shocked too! While people are always reminded of how important sex is in a relationship, it seems that this study points in the opposite direction. While it is totally your own preference that determines how big a part sex is in your relationship, it seems that there are lots of couples who enjoy healthy,long-term relationships without it, or at least with very little of it!
It goes to show that having less sex as your relationship matures does not necessarily mean anything bad is about to happen. You may go through phases where sex is of huge importance and phases where it is the last thing on your mind. The survey suggested that comparing your relationship to the expectations of others does not give life to a relationship. There isn’t obviously one secret to a long-lasting, healthy relationship but it all depends on what works for you and your partner together.
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