Guys: don’t ever doubt for a minute that your woman loves having sex; and she loves having sex with you! But sometimes, a few key aspects of lovemaking can be overlooked or forgotten in the shuffle. It’s important to go back to basics and remember the key things that make your girls’ night an epic one; here are five things that women want men to know about having sex with them.
Most women enjoy being treated like a precious gem in the bedroom now and again, and there’s something to be said for “lovemaking”, but this is not the only way that women like to have sex. Raunchy, dirty-talked, a little bit kinky; being more aggressive from time to time can be a welcome change of pace.
And you don’t always have to be the aggressor! Some women are looking for permission (or encouragement) to do a little hair-pulling themselves.
The important thing about this particularly is that you have constant communication about what you each like, don’t like, are willing to try, and things you simply won’t do. Never spring something extra aggressive on her until you discuss it first. A little biting and hair pulling is one thing, but full on tie-me-to-the-bed-and-drip-candle-wax-on-me merits a bit of discussion first.
Communication is important before, during, and after sex if you want a mind-blowing orgasm. Women want to know what it is you like and don’t like, and they certainly can’t read minds. Be gently vocal about things like “a little to the left” or “try caressing me here and not there”. Far from being seen as criticism, this important feedback will help her get more satisfaction from how she satisfies you.
But this isn’t the only way that you can use your mouth in bed. A devastating number of women will give oral sex in hopes of receiving it, only to be left wanting. Make sure that you’re paying her the attention which she pays to you and appropriately reciprocating. This is particularly important as most women (about 75% studies show) will not experience orgasm from vaginal sex alone. It’s important to consider all methods of erotic pleasure for her: G-spot stimulation, clitoral stimulation, and everything in between. Exploring her with your mouth is a great way to get the feel for where (and what) she likes and pursue that to its glorious finish.
It’s important that sexual encounters are mutually satisfying and, guess what, she’s not finished until she’s finished which means that you’re not either. A good standard (though not necessarily always the right answer) is “ladies first”. This way, you can pay special attention to her needs and desires while you’re still excited and raring to go. Also, because you did take special care to take care of her first, she will understand that you’re in this to make her feel good as well as get your own satisfaction from the encounter.
This will also ensure a fair amount of foreplay instead of a “use it and lose it” kind of evening. Because it takes women much longer to build to full orgasm, you’ll have your work cut out for you to get her there. Kissing, touching, caressing; all of these things will make her want to pleasure you even more. Essentially, in enacting this rule, it gives you plenty of time to focus on her needs and her desires, which is something that will not only drive her wild, but also keep her coming back for more!
This one should be a no-brainer: why invite someone to join you at your own party if you have just as much fun playing by yourself? If you don’t give a woman a reason to want you around, she’s going to opt for Netflix, a pedicure, and her good old trusty rabbit. While it can be arousing to watch each other play with yourselves, don’t make this the extent of your sexual encounter. Make sure that you’re an active, avid, and enthusiastic participant in the sex play rather than constantly asking her (explicitly or implicitly) to finish herself off. In following rule three, you should be able to cut this off at the pass; if you always ensure that she orgasms first, that’s a pretty good reason for her to invite you back for next time.
If you find it really erotic to watch her play with herself, perhaps consider allowing her to take herself halfway there, then swoop in to finish the job. Or perhaps provide her with some… ahem…. inspiration while she goes at it. No matter how you work it out, you want to ensure that your encounter is a mutual thing which gains momentum and excitement by having two people in the bed.
Whether it’s a one-night-stand, casual fling, or long-term and serious relationship, romance has an impact upon your sex life together. Even if she likes it a little bit rough in the sack, she still wants to be treated like a lady on the street. Remember: no matter how casual or serious this is, making her happy is a sure-fire way to encourage an epic evening of escapades. So hold the door; bring her flowers; watch a movie with her before you hit the hay; make her dinner. Make her feel special and see how the fireworks boom.